CHAPTER 36-BE MY MOTHER
I waddle slowly down the stairs, without making any alarming noises because I want to surprise these two people who have become integral to me. I can’t stay cooked up in that room of mine anymore. It has suffocated me adequately. Moreover, my hip doesn’t hurt that much. See, I am not even trudging anymore. Andy is just taking advantage so that he can keep cuddling me on the bed all day. I don’t mind though, but at least he should let me walk around.
I cross the sitting room and proceed to the kitchen. I wonder what they are doing? The aroma is so inviting from afar, but why the silence though? Why am I not hearing their little chit-chats or their outburst of laughter?
“Something smells so sweet in here! What are you guys cooking….”. I start announcing my presence the moment I set one foot inside the beautiful kitchen, but I stop midway. The aroma is sweet with no doubt, but the atmosphere here is something else. “What happened? What’s wrong?” I ask, strolling to where Andy and his daughter are perched looking like two absolute strangers. I have never seen them like this. Angel is about to tear up, and Andy is worried sick for his daughter. “Angel? Andy? what’s going on?” I ask again, and the little girl starts crying. Now, this is strange. Really strange! I have never seen her cry in this house.
Andy walks to her to embrace her, but she evades him and runs to me.
Jesus! Did they fight?
When Andy turns to us, he looks so dead sad. It’s there, the pain in his eyes is dominating his cool. If he wasn’t a man, he would be weeping right now. He closes his eyes tight, looking up and breathing in deeply.
“Angel? baby?” I call, but she doesn’t want to let go of me, and she is still sobbing. I stroke her hair gently. “Angel, talk to auntie. What’s wrong? Daddy and I are here to listen to you.” She still doesn’t badge. I look at Andy. His dark brown eyes have a tinge of redness in them. It’s hurting me to see him like this. It’s paining me to see them both like this.
He runs his hands through his hair, and then he walks to us, kneeling beside his daughter.
“Princess? Baby? Talk to daddy, please. Ask me anything you want. Say whatever is bothering you, princess. Daddy will do something, anything for my princess.” She shakes her head, not even bothering to turn her face to her father, and that breaks Andy’s heart into a thousand pieces. “Talk to her, Ania. Maybe… maybe she will… listen to you.” The hurt. The defeat. The brokenness. The worry. They are all I can make out of his voice.
“Why is she like this? What happened?” I ask, and he stands up.
“She was asking about her mother again.” He tried whimpering, but the worry in him made it slip out too audible.
“What did you tell her?”
“I just told her that her mother went far away, and that I don’t know if she will ever return.””And?”
“She just won’t talk to me anymore. I have tried and tried. She just won’t talk, Ania.” I give him a reassuring squeeze on the arm.This is from NôvelDrama.Org.
Fuck that shit of a woman!
I go down slowly on my knees, and take her face into my arms, drying away her tears.
“You know, sweetie. Daddy and I are here for you. Whatever you want, whatever you need, just tell us. What is it? You are making us worry, baby.” I plead.
“Daddy told me that mommy will never come back.” She says. Andy, upon hearing the voice of his daughter, kneels beside me in an attempt to comfort his precious daughter.
“But baby, I don’t want to lie to you. I’m sorry if that is not what you wanted to hear, okay? But did you want daddy to lie to his princess.” She shakes her head. “Well, I didn’t want to lie to you too. I’m sorry, okay?””But daddy?” She speaks amidst her sobs.
“Yes, baby?”
I let go of her cheeks so she can talk to her father with ease.
“Since my mother is gone, can you allow auntie Ania to be my mommy?”Shoot!
Andy’s eyes shoot at mine. Our eyes lock for a moment, both of us in total shock and confusion. Like two lost zombies, we take our gazes back to the innocent Angel in front of us.
“What?” We ask in unison, our mouths remaining agape.
“Why auntie? Don’t you want to be my mommy?”
Shit!
Ooh, dear kiddo!
That’s quite an intense one. Of course, I want to. But that’s entirely Andy’s decision. What do I tell her daughter now?
I look at Andy, signalling him to come to my aid, but his eyes are sternly fixed on his daughter. Oh, I know that look. He is thinking that why can’t he be enough for his daughter. Why can’t she be okay with just him. Whether he is failing in any way. And also, what to say to his daughter’s request.
I move my hand towards his side, holding his hand, and he snaps out of his thoughts, blinking a couple of times. He puffs out a sigh.
“Auntie?” We shot our eyes at her again. “You don’t want to be my mommy?””Ash… No… I mean, … You see, Princess… Why… wouldn’t I want to be a mother to a cute angel like you, huh? Right? You know I love you so much right?” I hold her hands, and she nods her head. “Well… but… you see.. aah!” What do I tell this kid now? “I..” I start, but I don’t have any convincing lie. I close my mouth.
“Just be my mother, please.”
I look at her pleading eyes. She is desperately longing for a mother, but that is not my decision to make.
Why aren’t you speaking, Andy? Why have you left all these to me? Help me talk to your daughter for hell’s sake! You are the only one who knows what exactly to say to her. So come on, Andy, please!
“Is that what you want, baby?”
I shift my eyes from Angel to Andy.
“Yes, daddy. I want to have a daddy and a mommy. And I want auntie Ania to be my mommy. Can you make her my mommy?” I am moved by this beautiful girl’s words, but my eyes are on Andy. I want to hear his answer. He wouldn’t have asked her if he didn’t have the answer, right?
So, does this mean…
“Then I have no problem, princess! She can be your mommy, but that’s if she agrees.” He looks at me, and a tear leaves my eye.
I am… I can’t explain it. I am shocked that he trusts me this much in such a short time, but I am also intrigued by the same.
Oh, dear!
Did he just say that? Does he really mean that? Does that mean that he trusts me and our love completely? He wants me to be part of his family? His life? I mean this much to him? My eyes are a pool of tears, and my vision is becoming blurry due to the thick curtains of tears hanging in my eyes. I close my eyes tight, bowing down as tears flow freely. I feel his arm caressing my back, but I am too emotional to a point that the magic of his soothing hand is not working on me.
“Say yes, mommy. Please!” The beautiful angelic voice of Angel makes me look up, and since I am so dry of words, I just pull her for a bear hug.
When I finally find my voice, I speak, still hugging her tight, as if I will never let her go which is my promise. I will dedicate my entire life to her and Andy. I will take care of them the way nobody could. I will shower them with love and care until my last breath.
“Yes, baby. I will be your mother from now on, my princess. Your daddy and I love you so much, okay?””I know, mommy. And I love you two so much.” I don’t know what they are doing behind my back, but the next thing I know, Andy joins in the hug from my behind. His one hand wraps around his daughter while the other one pours all its magic on my belly, awakening the butterflies that were sleeping in my stomach, and now, they are flying all over my body, not to mention that he is resting his chin on my shoulder.
After that long hug, they both help me stand up.
“Daddy?” Angel speaks, and Andy focuses his attention on her. I hope she won’t now ask for a sibling. Huh, this kid! “Promise me one thing, please.””Anything for my babies.”
Whoa! What are you saying, Andy? I throw him a quick glance.
“Babies, daddy?”
I am trying my level best not to burst out laughing. Babies, huh? Now explain to your smart daughter, Andy. Who are these babies you just mentioned? I also want to know.
“Ahh.. did I say, babies?” That made me chuckle, and he throws me a deadly glare, raising an eyebrow. “It must have been a slip of the tongue, baby. You know, you had daddy worried a while ago, but I am not mad. So, tell me. What is it that you want?””Promise me you will never let mommy Ania go away from us like my mother did.””I promise, baby. I promise.”
That short. That simple. But it means a million things to me. It’s the most beautiful promise I have heard so far, even if it wasn’t said directly to me.