First Love

Lily’s POV

My eyes open at the creaking sound of the door. Crinkling my eyebrows, I yawned and looked in the dark. It must be Adrain. But at this time? It maybe half past twelve or so. Yesterday he told me to stay away from him and now he’s here in my room?

A sharp fear rushed down my spine while thinking about him. What if he’s here to take another revenge on me?

I stood up to turn on the lights but before that could happen, I saw shadow of Adrain who seemed drunk. A breath of relief passed down to my chest. Drunk version of him is thousand times better than his real monster self.

Quickly, I turned on the light and shifted my attention to him. And one look of him made me restless. He was drenched in blood, his face had bruises, his knuckles were bleeding. He took disoriented steps towards the bed and all of sudden fell on the floor.

Hurriedly I rushed to him and tried to get him up but he shoved me away. “Stay away from me.”

He stood up and stumbling, lay down on the bed. Bedsheet became red with the colour of his bed and somewhere deep down I felt bad for him.

I know he did wrong to me but I am not inhuman to ignore the pain of person right Infront of me.

Licking my dry lips, I went closer to him.

“S-Stay away from me.” He screamed, clenching the fistful of his hair in his own hands.

I flinched but stayed rooted to my place. “Why?” I asked him, softly.

“Because I don’t want to hurt you.” He whispered.

I blinked. What had happened to him?

“I FUCKING DON’T WANT TO HURT YOU.” He screamed and with that all of sudden started hitting his forehead on the wall.

My pulse dropped in fear and my legs became paralyzed. How am I going to stop him? He’ll hurt himself?

So? Let him do that. He deserves to be hurt. My other voice told me but by ignoring it, I rushed to him and tried to pull him away from the wall but all in vain. He kept on banging his head to the wall and now blood was oozing out of his forehead.

“Y-You’re not hurting me, Adrain.”

“You’re not!” I tried to assure him but nothing helped.

At last I pulled him harder for one last time and he came rolling down to the bed. I pulled him into my arms tightly and started rubbing his back. “You’re not hurting me.” I lied.

He tried to get away from me but after sometimes he stilled in my arms. Amidst rubbing his back in assurance, I soothed him saying that he’s not hurting me over and over again till his breathing became normal.

We stayed in the same position for minutes. And honestly, it felt good to be in his arms I don’t know why but it did. Even after knowing that he hurt me beyond repair, I couldn’t help but feel an urge to save him from all his chaos. I don’t know why he’s been like this but I’ll try not to let him do all this.

“Today is the day when I lost them.” He wishpered softly.

And the cracking down of his voice was bit clear. Is he crying?

He pulled away from me and rested his head on my lap, I felt his tears streaming down his face.

Lost them? Who?

“Who, Adrain?”

He shook his head like a little child but didn’t say anything. I thought of asking him again but chose not to.

“Why are you hurting yourself?” I asked instead.Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org exclusive © material.

“Because I don’t want to hurt you.” He answered.

I exhaled a breath and asked him to sit. At first he was reluctant but soon he did so. I went to bring medical box for him and took a closer look of his face. It was covered in blood and bruises.

What had happened to him?

“What happened to you, Adrain?” I asked in concern.

He looked straight into my eyes and for a second we both stared into each other eyes, being unaware of the fact that he has kept me on hostage.

“I went to your brothers.” He stated.

My jaw dropped in shock. What?

“Why? And how did you get these bruises. Did they hit you?” I asked, cleaning his wounds.

“Do you care for me?”

I blinked at his question, not understanding how to answer. Off course, I hate him. How can I care for him but then why it clenches my heart to see him in this condition? Why I am cleaning his wounds with precaution so that I won’t end up hurting him.

When he heard no reply from me, he frowned. “I asked your brothers to hit me.”

“Why?”

“I wanted to get hurt so that I won’t hurt you.” He smiled.

And that was the first time when I saw him smiling. He never smiled but today his face was full of content as if he was happy that he didn’t hurt me.

I had no words to describe my inner conflict. My heart became heavy and everything around me turned different.

What’s wrong with him?

I applied ointments to his bruises and that man has not for once let out a voice in pain. How much could he endure pain? How much?

“Come let’s sleep.” I said.

He nodded like a child and patted the bed besides him for me to lay down. Blush crept up to my cheeks but after ignoring it, I lay beside him.

He snuggled closer to me and rested his head on my arms. I waited impatiently for him to fall asleep because it felt strange in my belly.

After an hour or so he felt asleep and left me wondering for whole night that why he’s acting different?